Chapter 81
Juvenile Weekend

So The Warrior and I went out on our date last night. You know, the date that I said would never happen because I was just joking when I asked him when we were going to go. So he kept brining it up and we decided to go see a movie. Then we tried to plan the cheapest date ever (which didn’t happen, not with the price of movies!) Then we threw in Cold Stone ice-cream because he’s never had any. So for the first time in…well, ever, I was excited for a date. Possibly because to me this wasn’t a date. So last night I picked him up at work and stopped by his house first because he wanted to check on his sister who was home alone and the power had gone out. Oh by the way, we got our first hurricane of the season and there was quite a bit of damage. So we pull up and there are candles lit and he seemed pretty surprised that his sister thought to light the candles. I ask if I should come in or just wait in the car, he said I could come in if I wanted to. As we were walking up he sees that his mom is home and he told me that his mom has been wanting to meet me. Almost instantly I get nervous, and then I remind myself that parents just like to meet their children’s friends. We go in and The Warrior introduces us and I get closer so I can shake her hand, she says she’s got something all over them but she can give me a hug, which she did. She says something about me being the imaginary person, so I guess they didn’t believe him about me. We talked to his mom for a bit, and then we drove to the mall which held Cold Stone within it’s walls. When we walked in and they asked us if we had been there before I told them that the Warrior had not been and they gave him a “tutorial”. I learned something new about Cold Stone, if you don’t like one of their mixes they make you another one. I can see why that rule doesn’t apply to the make your own deals because you could come up with nasty combinations and make the people keep making you new ones just because you’re a jerk. So I was stalwart about paying for the ice-cream since it was my suggestion to go there. He tried to put up a fight saying that I couldn’t pay because I was the girl and then finally he relented but said that he was paying for the movies, I may have said “okay” too quickly. Good news, he loved the ice-cream. He said that he needed to bring his family there, and he also said that he hadn't thought anything was better then Ben and Jerry’s, until now.
The Warrior didn’t talk all that much though, and if you know me then you know when there is silence I always try to fill it. So I was talking a lot and I’m pretty sure he knows just a little too much. But I also know that “My Girl” got him misty eyed the first time he saw it. So we are both sworn to secrecy. Except that I just wrote it and am probably going to post it on the internet for Sweet Pea and Oreo to read. After the movie I took him back to his house and we sat outside talking for about an hour, then finally I kicked him out of my car.
Then today at work Baby Face came up to me and out of no where asked if I wanted to come with him and a kid that I will call Steel Eyes (because seriously if you saw this kid’s eyes you would understand) to fork someone’s yard. Sometimes I feel like I need to do something once a year that helps to remind me how stupid I am. Last year I went out with some friends and the evening ended with me taking a breathalyzer and getting my picture taken by the police. So I said “yes”. I should have gone to the movie with my friends who had asked me if I wanted to go. Well, no cops this year, or breathalyzers thank goodness, but I have finally forked a yard. It just took me a couple of years after adolescence to do stupid stuff like this. I made it very clear to Baby Face and Steel Eyes that if the cops came I didn’t know who they were and I was out of there. No more run-ins with cops. I still can’t believe that I just forked someone’s yard tonight. Of course should this person ever confront me about it I am in complete denial. I did do something tonight that I used to do all the time in high school and that is to change in my car while driving to another destination. It’s quite the adrenaline rush; I never had enough time in high school, driving around from work to a friend’s house, or vice versa. I only ever changed at night because in the day time people can tell what you are doing. So I was following Baby Face and Steel Eyes and I completely changed my outfit. Shirt and pants and I even contemplated shoes, but decided my work shoes would be easier to run away in. And you know…boys aren’t very observant. I don’t think they even realized I was no longer in my work uniform. I think Baby Face did a double take but may have not said anything.
After forking the yard we drove around looking for food. You know, there’s a lot of false advertising here. We went to Wendy’s, where they were suppose to be open until midnight but they were closed and no one responded at the drive through. Then we went to Burger King, drive through open until 2am. We only saw this sign after walking up to the doors and they were already locked. So we all pile into my car and went through the drive through. The car in front of us had driven through and then was behind us and that’s when we realized that no one was going to take our order. By this point I had gotten all excited about a slushy because Steel Eyes had offered to pay for all of us. So we drive next door to McDonald’s, who by the way does not sell slushies, and by this point Baby Face and I feel so dejected that we no longer take Steel Eyes up on his offer. We were going to go into McDonald’s but Baby Face said that we should go through the drive through instead of go inside because there were a bunch of rednecks in there. So I said, “What? You don’t want to hang out with your family?” Steel Eyes thought it was funny; Baby Face was a little A.D.D. tonight and didn’t hear me the first time. So Steel Eyes repeated it for me and then I think I got a jokingly “F-You.” Except he said the word…I think there is a language barrier between us.
At one point tonight I told both of them that I had no idea who they were. And that’s the honest truth. First off, I have always been scared to death of Steel Eyes…could be his piercing to your soul just by looking at you, but I don’t know, maybe it’s just because I never really talk to him and I don’t know how to act around him because of it. And while I knew Baby Face had a dirty mouth I didn’t realize how bad it was, and I suppose I had assumed his personality fit his face. I would have never thought Steel Eyes would fork a yard, but he was the most experienced one of us all. But I finally got to hang out with Baby Face, and you know what? Even though I got quite the adrenaline rush tonight hanging with Baby Face and Steel Eyes when I got home I was more satisfied with my night spent out with The Warrior.